Over the past few days I dreamed that I met with a dreamy new doctor (who kept a scrapbook of his favorite poems), attended a gun training seminar, my house was burning down, entering a regrettable contract and living in house with others that was somehow all connected to the Devil, a dog working for the Devil, cannibalism, being one day away from giving birth and lastly, accepting an "ultraviolet cancer" that would give me special abilities. About that ultraviolet cancer, they gave it to me once before, but I rejected it so they took it away. But after lying in bed with a lizard man who had the ultraviolet cancer (via a small robot he showed me on his tongue), I decided to give it another try. Once the process began I was warned to be careful and secretive about my new special powers. So sadly I will not be blogging/blabbing about them. In this day and age, and as a busy mom, I simply can't risk the chance of the government or a nefarious corporation finding out and turning me into a weapon.
I think you understand. Yes, I think you do.