Gideon is doing really well. Off all pain meds, running around like normal. I, on the other hand, feel like I've aged at least 10 years -- especially after Sunday afternoon when he fell down an entire flight of stairs. "I fell like a ball" he bragged. It was all a bit much for me. My muscles ache, I walk around with my shoulders touching my ears. I'm starting to wonder if this is all a preschool-wing conspiracy to kill me.

Last night I dreamed that I returned to high school after a mysterious absence. In the cafeteria a bully girl sat in my seat. I asked her to move. She wouldn't. So I picked her up and slammed her against another table. I held her down and dared her to free herself. She couldn't. She told me that I was "insanely strong" and I added that I was very angry too.

When I woke I pondered it, was she saying that I was very strong or did she mean I was intensely crazy? I feel a little crazy after this past week.