Gideon likes to write letters.

He addresses the letters to URLs.

It looks something like: wwwdjlfkajsiouvnehbdkjafnkjsh34djdfk.com

We leave these letters in our mailbox.

I haven't the heart to tell Gideon that the postman never takes them.

Gideon knows our zip code.

He uses it to check our forecast on weather.com.

Obsessively.

He told me that he Wakes Up with Al.

He said that I wake up with Al too.

I most certainly do not wake with Al.

Gideon has imaginary parents.

He says he has 100 daddies and 2 mommies.

I interpret this as a reference to his angels, spirit guides, messengers, etc.

The other day Chris pulled into a parking spot next to a jacked-up, giant pick-up truck with an inane bumper sticker that I found offensive and stupid.

I said, "Don't park next to this idiot, he's gonna ding our car."

Gideon said, "He's not an idiot! He's my daddy."

Gideon told a story about how that daddy can never sleep because his truck is always bouncing up and down, making all kinds of noise.

Then I had to assure Chris that I wasn't nailing the dipshit with the monster truck.

Parenting can be so tricky sometimes.