Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 6

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

__(Poet 1)__ tells me about the bombings. There's something I don't about what's going on, but people think I should know. I keep asking __(Poet 1)__ to tell me and I'm getting frustrated. Finally __(Poet 1)__ explains that a group of women poets (and maybe a few men) are behind the bombings and it's been going on for a while. The male poets are the ones who report the news, poets like __(Poet 2)__, Anderson Cooper and others. They want to report what's really going on in the Middle East, but the news station management won't let them unless it happens live during the day. So this is a way to get the news out. Maybe the men don't even know that the women poets are behind it. While I agree with the politics of getting news out, I'm very troubled by these tactics. I think of a little boy who died in a recent bombing and I get upset.

* * *

I'm reading an article about new and upcoming writers. I recognize some of the names, __(Poet 1)__ and __(Poet 2)__. I comment to __(Poet 3)__ that my father's mustache is back in style. I show the article to another person and comment on __(Poet 3)__'s mustache. I'm not sure why I brought up her mustache, it doesn't seem necessary to the discussion. I explain how few people our age have a mustache (although __Poet 3___does). I tell __Poet 3__ that must be because she's older than me and perhaps she's closer in age to my father than me. This doesn't make her happy.

* * *

I'm at my childhood home. It's wintertime and there's snow on the ground. There are postal carriers who receive sexual favors when they deliver mail--right at the mailbox. I have pictures of this. I'm concerned this involves children. It also appears that the same things is happening with cashiers at a local grocery store. I want to report all of them, but I don't know how. I walk across the street to a neighbor's home. Maybe I'm going to tell them. Chris stops me. He takes pictures of the landscape. The snow is amazing and across the street where the church and school normally would be, there's an ocean. The trees, the snow, the ocean. It's beautiful. I post the pictures to Facebook. _______ sees the pictures.

* * *

An old man poet, balding with a ponytail, is dying. The old man wants  _______ to take over his work. A nearby woman says that it would be fantastic for _______ to take over his work. I think this is a terrible position to put _______ in. He/she already has his/her own projects to take care of. I feel like nobody is thinking of _______. I give _______ a hug and tell him/her that he/she doesn't have to do this.

* * * 

A man shows me an old videotape. After we met, he thought he remembered seeing something about me from a long time ago. The recording starts halfway through some kind of newscast. There's a quote from _______ and then a report about something that happened to a young girl. The pictures from the newscast are me in 1st and 2nd grade. I have no idea what event or circumstances this old newscast is referencing. I have no memory of any of it. I decide to ask _______ about it. _______ has never mentioned anything about this before.

* * *

I'm sharing a dorm room with three other people. One of them is _______. I find _______ obnoxious. _______ is always complaining, passive aggressively, often about something that has to do with me. I'm making ________'s bed and find my book about Tarot. Earlier _______ complained that he/she didn't want that stuff near him/her, yet he/she's taken mine. I'm totally fed up with _______. I complain about _______, say that when roommates were being selected, I knew _______ would try to latch on to me because he/she has no friends.

I have a chance to get a new roommate. A really short man, like a dwarf, is selected. I talk to him, trying to figure out who he is. I'm told he's been in the 6th grade a very long time. I'm wondering then why is he going to college. Is he brilliant and being held back because of his size or does he have some kind of mental disability? Maybe there's some kind of issue with him. Maybe he rapes me or maybe he doesn't. Maybe it's somebody else. Maybe I'm in a relationship with this person. I'm not sure of any of it.

* * *

I'm in a poetry workshop. The teacher tells us to each take one of the assignments. I pick up one that asks me to draw stars on a Christmas tree and write different characteristics something should have. I'm supposed to come up with thousands. There's already a couple hundred on there. I draw a star and write "adventure" and "daring" I write a few more. Then I realize that I'm supposed to pass it around. We're all supposed to pass around these assignments to each other. I take another assignment. It's a typed prose poem. _______ ate a poem and shit it out. Apparently it took a while for the paper to pass, so he/she only had time to shit out the poem and rewrite it. Now we all need to work on it.

* * *

I'm running up a stairwell trying to escape from __Poet 1__. I see __Poet 2__. I tell __Poet 2__ not to tell __Poet 1__ that he/she has seen me. I'm in a college dormitory and run into my sister's freshman dorm room. My sister is with her roommate and two male friends. I tell them how __Poet 1__ threatened my life. Then I say that maybe __Poet 1__ is really not going to kill me but instead has written some really insane things about me. Then I notice one of the guys sitting on the bed is __Poet 1__. He's smiling and being friendly. It's like he doesn't realize that I'm talking about him. I keep talking like I'm not.

* * *

It's night, snow has fallen. _______ is standing outside of my house. I assume he/she's trying to sell me something, so I leave him/her out there. 

* * *

I'm tweeting with _______. _______ comments about how poets are getting angry because he doesn't respect their privacy of what they're posting on FB. I unfriend _______ on FB, just to make a point. I intend on refriending him when he understands. At this point we only have 2 mutual friends.

Now _______ is my husband and in the room with me. He's pissed about the unfriending. I look out the window and see thick, dark clouds. I say "there's a storm coming" and see a tiny tornado starting to form in our back yard. _______ wants to run and hide. I suggest the basement. It's my childhood basement and it's mostly empty. We then go down into the garage. It's falling apart, holes and missing bricks. The door is broken. I tell _______ that the door will have to be replaced

The storm ends and we go back upstairs. I notice the kitchen faucet is broken and gushing water. I tell _______ to fix it.

* * * 

_______ is offering to give manuscript critiques for just $19. _______ requests for the font be "lithy" and not to approach him/her if your previous work was published by "Poetry Pile."

* * *

_______ emails, calling me on something I've done. I concede that he/she has a point, but point out that he/she does the same thing and worse. As usual, _______ is being hyper-critical for his/her strange, unbalanced, emotional reasons.

Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 5

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

_______has strange hair that sort of pops up in the back like a tail. There's something in his/her hair that does this, it looks like a tube, maybe of some kind of hair product. I want to snip it off, but know he/she wants it there, so I cover it with some kind of cup. 

I believe this looks better.

* * *

__(Poet 1)__ is responding online to jokes and insults that __(Poet 2)__ (and to a lesser extent, me) have made online about him/her. __(Poet 1) points out what we've done and said. I want to contact __(Poet 1)__ and let him/her know that anything I've ever wrote was only done in jest. __(Poet 1) somehow knows about a file folder about him/her where __(Poet 2)__ and I add our jokes and insults.

* * *

_______ recently moved to NYC. I refer to something relating to him/her as "traditional." _______ shushes me. He/she motions to his/her sister behind me. I didn't mean "traditional" as an insult, but more as a description, but perhaps the sister might not want to be referred to as traditional. I ask the sister if she lives in Wisconsin. She says that she just moved to "the city." I know she means NYC, but I think it's obnoxious when people refer to it as "the" city, so I play dumb and ask which city. When she tells me NYC I tell her that I live right outside of DC so when I hear "the city" that's what I think of.

* * *

I'm on a porch discussing politics with a group of people. George Will is here and very loud. I explain to someone that this weekly meeting has been happening for years, way back when my grandfather was alive and lived here. George Will is one of the few from that time that is still around and attends. The discussion ends. George Will gets up and walks away. he's wearing some very fashion-conscious black pants, with zippers. For a moment he looks like _______.

* * *

I'm in a car with _______. There are these "cool" poets, biker, dreadlock-wearing poets who's been ignoring me for years standing in the parking lot. I've applied for their attention before, but they continue to ignore me. They don't recognize my uniqueness or innovation. They get in their van, drive around the parking lot. I assume they're ignoring me again, but one of the cool woman poets looks at me. I wave. They stop, but want to talk to _______.They want to photograph ______ for something. _______ has only one look, it's plain and not very interesting. They want _______ to do different poses and make different faces. I try to help _______ by giving him/her direction. _______ makes some funny poses, like Rodin's thinker. They pose _______ next to a replica of a city. I suggest to _______ that he/she pick up the buildings and pretend to eat them. I think this is pretty interesting. But the cool poet photographer doesn't agree and stops snapping pictures.

* * *

_______ says she will mother me, mother me ten times.

* * *

__(Poet 1)__ developed a close relationship with __(poet 2)__. It's unclear if their relationship was platonic or more. __(Poet 1)__ described it as them be "close cousins." People didn't react well to their relationship and __(Poet 2)__ felt like she had to cut it off. I explain to __(Poet 1)__ that people discriminate against older women with younger men. __(Poet 1)__ tells me that there were serious bomb threats.

Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 4

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

_______ is working on a PhD. There's something wrong with _______, some kind of alzheimer's and he/she seems to be slowly loosing it. There's a bunch of hypodermic needles and some kind of serum that he/she's supposed to inject him/herself with. A girl I don't like from high school is here teasing/bullying _______. I tell the bully to stop. I ask _______ how much longer he/she needs to finish her PhD., I'm worried he/she'll have lost his/her mind before she completes it. He/she has one more class to take and then he/she has to write her thesis -- so I'm guessing 2-3 years, maybe. I'm worried that's too long. _______ says that his/her advisor believes that he/she's really improved recently and a level he/she hasn't been before. I don't share that opinion.

I'm cleaning up and putting all of _______'s needles back into a case. Some of the needles get stuck in my shin and calf. I pull them out. I'm hoping these aren't the needles that _______ has already used, I'm concerned about being infected with something. 

* * *

There's a rivalry between __(poet 1)__ and __(poet 2)__. I'm staying out of it. __(Poet 1) is acting like he/she doesn't really care about it, but I hear from some guy that __(poet 1)__ has a plan to send __(poet 2) to jail in 30 minutes. I have no problem with __(poet 2) going to jail, but I don't want to be part of anything that's not on the up and up. I don't want to frame __(poet 2)__. I just want him/her to go away.

* * *

Canadian poets want to talk to me. Every Canadian poet except __(poet 1)__. 

I'm in __(poet 2)__'s office which is a tent. His/her desk is covered with unorganized papers. He/she gives me a six figure check that Canadian poets raised for Barack Obama that he/she wants me to deliver. __(Poet 2)__ also gives a second paper for me. I put both items in my purse to keep them safe. When __(poet 2)__ leaves, I look for some note paper to leave him/her a thank you note, but everything is already written on, include all of the stick-it notes. I cross-stitch a quick note that says "Canadian Poets Rock."

 __(Poet 2)__ returns and unstitches my lettering because he/she thinks its sloppy and wants to redo it.

I am insulted.

* * *

Chris and I are talking about _______'s work. Chris believes _______'s second book contains all his/her woman poems whereas his/her first book contains all his/her penis poems. I say that I don't know. _______ has written a lot of poems.

* * *

I'm talking to a class about Flarf. I can't see the class. Someone challenges me about Flarf, says I don't know any Flarf. So I name names. I mention __(poet 1)__ and __(poet 2)__. A fancy Lexus drives by. A woman in the back seat holds her glass out the window. She wants some of __(poet 2)__'s bourbon. __(Poet 2)__ pours her a glass.

I tell the students that my favorite Flarf book is by __(poet 3)__. I say how one time I sent __(poet 3)__'s publisher, __(poet 4)__, some money for some work that he/she never did. I want to teach his/her book, but it's out-of-print. So I'm using a computer program that converts the out-of-print book into a new file format. It's making a drawing of a high heel shoe with a pointy toe. Each short line, from point to point, is a line from a poem in the book. It's all connected.

Poets converge on __(poet 4)__'s house to help him/her with the press. __(Poet 5)__ enters holding a bag of golf clubs and tennis balls. He/she explains how he/she helped a woman lose weight. Someone makes a snotty comment, "Oh, let me guess, you told her to eat less and exercise more."

Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 3

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

In a pond, there's some kind of creature holding a pearl. I go into the water and grab the pearl. A big schnauzer pursues me, won't leave me alone. I keep trying to push the dog away, give it the slip, but I can't shake it. In the water below a stingray follows the dog. This is a problem because I can't get away from the dog. I can't seem to push either away.

Somehow I get out of the pond. I'm in a childhood room. G is scuttling back and forth really quickly, like a crab. Somehow this all relates back to _______.

* * *

_______ and I are standing around, talking and planning to do something. Right before we do it, someone else does something that lights up the network and beats us to it.

A tunnel-like hole (blackhole, wormhole ?) opens up in the floor just a few feet away. Like looking down into a tunnel into space. G is nearby and I show him, but tell him to be sure not to fall into it because I'll never be able to get him back. G backs up. He sees _______'s coat on the floor, picks it up and drops the coat into the hole to see what would happen. _______ is beside himself/herself and looks at me. I look down the hole and I see that the coat is still stuck at the top, but I don't try to pull it out, seems too dangerous. Then G steps right into the hole and goes down. I see _______'s coat is still stuck at the top, but no G, he fell through. I start to scream. If this is a dream I want to wake up. I fall down to the ground.

I wake up still screaming. I'm in a house, screaming and crawling on the floor. I wonder if possibly I've ended up where G went. I go into an all white room and see a nerdy, Conan Obrien-type man trying to figure something out. I believe that I have no hope of ever getting G back, but I ask the man for help. The man tells me that he has no idea how any of this works.

* * *

I'm at a school function. I'm walking up stairs with G and _______. _______ is holding tightly onto my arm. I ask several times for him/her to let go, but he/she doesn't. I ask him/her to go somewhere else, but he/she doesn't. One of G's teachers walks up the stairs behind us. I feel like we look terrible in front of the teacher. I sent G into the classroom and take _______'s arm, I tell him/her that he/she's not listening and making us look terrible. I then threaten to beat him/her up. _______ is angry with me. I'm angry with _______.

* * *

I'm in a bar. A man follows a woman to a backroom to harass her. I follow and yell at the man. I tell the women not to go back there alone. The women don't seem to appreciate my help. The whole situation makes me very angry.

I hear that __(poet 1)__died. I try to read about it in the Washington Post, but another poet grabs it form me. I read half the story in the Washington Post online, but can't get the whole story because its behind a paywall. The part of the article I read is how he/she'll be missed, the poetry scholarship fund his/her will sets up. Now I'm really sad. I check his/her FB wall to see when the last time he/she posted. It looks like September 10. I'm wondering when he/she died and how. 

I ask __(poet 2)__. __(poet 2)__ says that both __(poet 1)__ and his/her spouse died in their parked car. Another car drove over four layers of cars and on top of theirs. __(poet 2)__ thinks it sounds suspicious. Why did the car do that? Was the driver drunk? Was it intentional? That information is not available.

 __(poet 1)__'s parents are the owners of the bar, working behind the counter. I'd been at the bar all this time and didn't know about their loss. I try to walk into the women's restroom, but hear one of the hostesses speaking to another hostess about getting __(poet 1)__'s dad to come in and help them. Something really gross and awful is going on, a toilet isn't flushing. I say that I don't have to go that bad. For some reason I keep touching the floor (like I'm crawling) in the bar. It's dirty and sticky.

* * *

I'm  joining _______'s press. I'm looking at the Statcounter and the Google Adsense data. A while back the press' website made $28 in one day. It made $4 recently and two $1 days -- from my usage on the website. I'm very impressed. I'm not yet mentioned on the website.

There's a picture of _______ with 3 older ladies. One is Betty White. The picture is taken at a Washington monument. It's kind of arty they're all looking away and sitting in a row. The women are wearing matching t-shirts with a cardigan sweater over top.

Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 2

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I'm talking with _______ about giving advice to people.That it's easy to spend a lot of energy and time answering people's questions and giving guidance, but often they won't actually do the project they're inquiring about. I say that it's good to help people, but not to immerse yourself totally in their work and not to be upset if they don't do the work they say they're interested in.

I walk up the driveway of a childhood home. There's a garden that a guy asked my advice on, but he never followed it. There are plants with blue flowers/pods. I take a few and eat them. They have a drug-like reaction. I'm amazed at how high they make me feel and how powerful. I'm feeling very alive and desirous.

* * *

I'm with my Dad. We're watching a video by _______ My dad is of mixed opinions of _______. He likes some of his/her work, but finds some of _______ disturbing. I don't think he's made a final decision on _______. _______ refers to me in his/her video, something about how he/she likes my work. He/she calls me "Rebecca" instead of Reb.

* * *

_______is on tour for her book. She's standing around, talking to people. She's wearing a skirt. She's pretty and in very good shape. She looks great.

* * * 

I'm in Europe at a dinner. I learn that this meal was planned and that 30 years ago I was part of a study run by a group of nuns. They've been tracking us the whole time to see what became of us.  I have no memory of ever being part of any study. I'm a little skeeved out about it.

I'm dress sloppily for this meal and want to change. I see a friend from high school. She let's me borrow her clothes. I show her a tattoo on my leg. It's smudged, but still there. My friend has this same tattoo. So does _______. 

I'm taking a shower in the middle of a room where people are walking in and out. I'm using _______'s facewash and shampoo.

Now I'm wearing better clothes. I have to two pairs of shoes to choose from: one pair is a purple/burgundy that I fear might be too matchy-match with my pants. The other pair is silver.

A woman who was also part of the study (and remembers it) shows me pictures from that time, when we were children. There also is photograph of a woman listed as a fortune teller.

* * *

Even when vegetables begin ranking and prioritizing they begin with the meat and potatoes of their groups.

There are two groups of poets. Beginning with _______.

Guess the Dream Poet (2013) - Part 1

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I'm at a party. A bunch of us are talking smack about _______. I talk some smack about him/her and his/her dad. _______ walks into the party. I sit on a chair in the corner and revise my book. It has the same black cover as The Memory Reader, but it's a draft of my book mixed in with an anthology that I edited.

_______ sits next to me and asks about the book. He/she clearly feels very confident and back in his/her game because he/she says, "Let's go make love." 

I snap back, "Absolutely not" so quickly and forcefully that he/she seems taken aback. I say that I'm sorry, but I need to be very clear on this matter.

* * *

I'm in a storage room talking about prom gowns and how they're so casual these days. Then I'm in a theatre audience watching a play where women sing, including Kristin Stewart and _______, sing from caskets. They sounds great.

Someone passes out gifts to the women in the play who are sitting in the audience. They're receiving beautiful, sparkling jewelry. ______ gets me a gift too. At first it looks like inexpensive costume jewelry bracelets, but after looking at it closer, I realize that it's four unmatched (right-handed) gloves. One is long and seems like it would keep my book-holding arm warm when rest of me is under a blanket reading. I'm not sure if I would use these single gloves and am considering taking them back to the store for a refund, but it doesn't seem like I'd get a lot of money for them.

* * *

_______ wants to charge a $20 reading free to encourage poets only to send their best work. Some guy and I agree that's a jerk thing to do.

* * *

I'm in bed with JFK talking about a book about JFK that I'm reading. There's some confusion about the author and which book I'm reading. The cover looks like Black Antoinette: The Work of Olaf Hajek. Then I'm in bed with some other guy that I don't want JFK to know about.  Then it switches again and I'm in bed with _______.

* * * 

I'm in a neighborhood in Homestead called Baby Uplands. I tell __(poet 1)__ that he/she should tell his/her friend, Baby Shambles (meaning __poet 2__) about this place.

* * *

I'm playing a video matching game with _______. He/she gets the first match. Then I get one too. Now we're supposed to convince some kind of mythological woman to touch us. We walk into a room and there are some scary women with octopus legs. I'm thinking they're not who I'm supposed to get in touch with. I need to find the mythological woman who's more like a mermaid. 

I find her. She's kind to me. I raise my hands, in hopes that she'll touch me, but she walks away abruptly. Then she becomes a man and mansplains to us that to be touched that way would be to take us out of this realm. He says that we should be part of this realm and that this realm has its own magic. Being sent to the other realm makes it so you can't really have contact with this realm. 

I understand all this and I really don't want to go into the other realm, but it's the next thing I'm supposed to do. Reluctantly, the man touches me and I change. He hands me a platter that falls through my hands and onto the floor.

The Dream Poet Anthology 2013

Below are the names of poets who made appearances or were mentioned in my dreams during 2013. Some of these poets I know well, others are acquaintances and some are complete strangers. If you find your name is on this list and you do not know me, it means that I know of you via your work or reputation and my psyche has attached some type of meaning or symbolism on you to represent something. Maybe I follow you on Twitter? Maybe somebody I follow retweeted one of your tweets? Maybe you post really obnoxious Facebook updates that haunt me late at night?

Or maybe it means something else completely. Who can say with any certainty what a dream means? Maybe it means you've been selected for a psychic quest of great importance? Maybe it means I'm watching you through a pair of binoculars at this very moment? Who knows. 

Just don't ask me for details of the dream. Seriously, don't. Every year people disregard this note and ask me. It's usually people who appeared in my dreams as corpses. So for the sake of everyone's mental health, I'm not telling you. 

2013 Contributors:

Deborah Ager, Hugh Behm-Steinberg, Aaron Belz, April Bernard, Anselm Berrigan, Lucy Biederman, Julie Bloemeke, Anne Boyer, Brandon Brown, Blake Butler, Laura Carter, Lucille Clifton, Kelly Cockerham, Shanna Compton, Eduardo Corral, Bruce Covey, Catherine Daly, Peter Davis, Teri Cross Davis, Oliver de la Paz, Alex Dimitrov, Michael Dumanis, Donald Dunbar, Thomas Sayers Ellis, Jill Alexander Essbaum, Jenny Factor, James Franco, Elisa Gabbert, Neil Gaiman, Roxane Gay, Kim Gek Lin Short, Bernadette Geyer, Tod Goldberg, Nada Gordon, Lea Graham, Jorie Graham, Arielle Greenberg, Charles Jensen, Joe Harrington, Rebecca Hazelton, Patrick Herron, Ron Hogan, Major Jackson, Bhanu Kapil, Kirsten Kaschock, Collin Kelley, Caitlín R. Kiernan, Kevin Killian, Amy King, Alan King, Rauan Klassnik, Becca Klaver, Jennifer L. Knox, David Lehman, Jon Leon, Patricia Lockwood, Natalie Lyalin, Tony Mancus, Cate Marvin, Joseph Massey, David McDonald, Erika Meitner, Chris Murray, Gina Myers, Micki Myers, Aimee Nezhukumatathil, Daniel A. Nicholls, Mel Nichols, Seth Oelbaum, Ed Ochester, Maria Padhila, Danielle Pafunda, Richard Peabody, Jessica Piazza, Scott Pierce, Nate Pritts, PF Potvin, Michael Quattrone, Adam Robinson, Anthony Robinson, Steve Roggenbuck, Sean Rohwedder, Lee Ann Roripaugh, Kathleen Rooney, Ken Rumble, Allyson Salazar, Elizabeth Savage, Steven Schroeder, Zach Schomburg, Evie Shockley, Laurel Snyder, Ricco Siasoco, Martha Silano, Sandra Simonds, Laura Sheahen, Nicole Steinberg, Janaka Stucky, Gary Sullivan, Maureen Thorson, Rich Villar, Chris Vitiello, Allyssa Wolf, C. Dale Young, Dean Young, Mike Young

Frequently Asked Questions


Q: I'm a writer, but not a poet. Why am I included on a poet list?
A: Simmer down and accept the compliment.

Q: Can I submit my work for next year's anthology?
A: This anthology only accepts psychic submissions. Submit to my unconscious and perhaps you will be allowed in.

Q: Does my appearing on this list mean that you are obsessed with or stalking me? 
A: Possibly. 

Q: Will you tell me the details of the dream I appeared in? 
A: No, absolutely not. Assume the dream was totally demented and would disturb you a great deal. I will not tell you.

Q: I'm a poet and I'm psychically awesome, why aren't I included in this anthology?
A: There are three possible reasons you are not included:

1. You didn't appear in my dreams in 2013. Resolve in 2014 to be more ambitious psychically.
2. You did appear in my dreams, but I don't remember. I forget many dreams. Your omission is a simple case of editorial oversight. You were screwed, unintentionally.
3. You did appear in my dreams, but I am loathe to publicly admit such a thing. This applies to a small percentage of poets appearing in my dreams. Your omission is a simple case of editorial bias. You were screwed, intentionally.


Mad Poet Libs:

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 1 (2013)

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 2 (2013)

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 3 (2013)

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 4 (2013)

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 5 (2013)

Guess the Dream Poet - Part 6 (2013)


Past anthologies:

The Dream Poet Anthology 2012

The Dream Poet Anthology 2011

The Dream Poet Anthology 2010

The Dream Poet Anthology 2009

guess the dream poet -- part 5 (2012)

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I walk into a classroom. __(Poet 1)__is the teacher. While I was away, s/he gave a very detailed pop quiz that asks all kinds questions about poets and poetry. I don't know why s/he expects everyone to know this, then I figure there was required reading that I didn't do. I sit down next to __(Poet 2)__ who lets me copy his/her answers. The text has many questions and is complicated. There are fill in the blank questions and columns of questions. It's confusing where to put the answers. I'm copying answers from __(Poet 2)__ at random, throughout the test, with little rhyme or reason. There seems to be an unending number of questions. Somebody comes by and checks to see how we're doing. I flip __(Poet 2)__'s test over so they can't tell I'm copying it. They tell me that I need to hurry up. Then they come back and take __(Poet 2)__'s test. There's still a lot of questions I need to answer.


* * *

__(Poet 1)__ and __(Poet 2)__ have space in their van for me to go to the Yancy concert with them. I ask if they have an extra ticket and they say they have plenty. I'm not really familiar with Yancy, I remember __(Poet 3)__ posting a Yancy video on Facebook that was so-so. I tell them I need a few minutes. I go inside a childhood home and pee for a very long time while considering changing my sneakers to my boots because it'll look better.


* * *

I'm in NYC with __(Poet 1)__. We're in a fancy hotel lobby but we have to cross the street to a cheap hotel because __(Poet 1)__ doesn't want to pay more than $50 a night. We walk past __(Poet 2)__ and __(Poet 3)__ lying down on the ground, doing some kind of ironic performance thing to get attention for their reading this evening. I'm not going to go to their reading. I'll sooner go to a random stranger's reading.


* * *


I'm in my long abandoned elementary school. Everything inside has been painted white. _____ is here teaching a class. I know s/he's supposed to be dead, but s/he's come back from the dead to teach. There's a concern (perhaps it's just mine) that perhaps his/her time is past and s/he shouldn't be coming back. But then again, now there's still an opportunity to study with _____.


* * *

I'm crossing the street to find an office to work on the 2012 Dream Poet Anthology. I think about how __(Poet 1)__ probably feels replaced by __(Poet 2)__. That's because __(Poet 1)__ has been replaced by __(Poet 2)__.

guess the dream poet -- part 4 (2012)

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I get a call from _____ asking for help regarding the confluence software. I say that I'm not a teacher and have never used it, but s/he can come by and I'll try to help. I go to confluence.com to try to figure it out.


* * *

I'm following _____ around. S/he's next to some kind of machinery. I tell him/her that I used to be really intimidated by him/her when s/he ran this machinery. Now I seem to be the one who's a bit intimidating or maybe s/he didn't think I was intimidated before. I put my face close to his/hers, like we're close. Someone sees this through a window. Things have really changed between us.


* * *

I walk into a crowded auditorium with __(Poet 1)__. We look for empty seats together. We find two seats together and there seems to be a third I can hold for __(Poet 2)__. It's empty so I try to take it but Jack Nicholson says he's using it. He says he needs two because his wife is pregnant. I don't think he needs two and try to take it. I argue with him. __(Poet 3)__ and __(Poet 4)__ in the rows behind think I'm being a bitch for arguing for this chair. Or the way I argue. It just seems unfair. If I stand up for myself, I'm asking for it. Poets in the back rows are throwing wads of paper at me. __(Poet 5)__ comes up to __(Poet 2)__ and says that Walton Goggins (a boy in one of my dream high school classes) is saying some really means things about me. He really can't stand me. I like him and this hurts my feelings. I want him to like me. I get up and walk around the auditorium, in front of the rows of other kids who don't like me. I try to keep my composure.


* * *

A woman briefly dated _____. She brings _____ to a building under construction because he has to pee on something. Then she's going to jump off a building to sacrifice herself for some greater cause. _____ is watching, but he's not real concerned that she's going to kill herself. He's sitting, doing something with his arms, like he's pretending to drive. As the woman stands on the edge she realizes that something is about to explode. She runs off, I assume to protect _____ and others. The explosion happens within seconds. I assume she dies. _____ is OK. I ask _____ what was the woman's name. He can't remember, they only dated for a few days.


* * *

_____ trims his/her eyebrows. I do exactly what s/he does, but it’s way too short and there’s a bald spot in my eyebrows. There’s a discussion about whether or not eyebrows should be trimmed at all.

guess the dream poet -- part 3 (2012)

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I'm watching a political debate. _____ is the new candidate and s/he's debating John McCain, Mitt Romney and other old establishment, conservative candidates. S/he's calling them out on cruelty and other terrible things (like war). McCain goes after _____, mentions something about the 60's and then points out that _____ wasn't even alive during the 60's. _____ acknowledges this, then s/he pauses and it seems like s/he's stumped or thrown off, there's silence, but then _____ responds. The people in the audience likes what s/he has to say.


* * *

I go into a Safeway and walk around the bakery, but don't see what I want so I go to another grocery store. I seem to be planning for dinner (buying vegetables) and dessert (looking for a cake or something). I get 4 doughnut holes to try to them out, 2 chocolate and 2 caramel. I'm eating them. _____ seems ticked that I'm not sharing. But I plan to share the big dessert, whenever I get it.


* * *


I'm upset with _____, how s/he criticizes something that s/he takes part in, like watching the OctoMom on TV.


* * *


We stop at a sorbet/ice cream store. As I try to walk in __(Poet 1)__ is standing in front of me, blocking the way. S/he's still complaining about how s/he was wronged at dinner. I try to pass a few times. Finally I say excuse me really loud and walk past him/her. __(Poet 2)__ is behind the counter, offering to scoop ice cream..


* * *


I give a toast at a wedding. It's funny and people laugh. The next toast is given by _____. S/he goes on a bit too long, gushes a bit too much and acts like a weirdo poet. In a poetry setting this might be OK, but here it's too much and people are uncomfortable, weirded out by it. I'm in a weird position because I can't align myself too much with _____, but I can't discount how creeped out everyone else is by what s/he's saying. My sister is grimacing.

guess the dream poet - part 2 (2012)

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

I'm at some place -- a store? a place for a reading? _____ is here. Or s/he's not. I'm either embracing him/her or his/her memory. His/her mother died and s/he died not long after. His/her father was sick for a long time and it seemed like he'd be the first to go, but now he's the last. He's alone.


* * *

I'm walking in the Reston Town Center and see ____ walking down the sidewalk. I say hello. _____ doesn't recognize me at first. I say "Rebecca Livingston," "Reb Livingston." I say it really fast, but s/he understands. ____ says that s/he will be on Chopped. In this dream, Chopped assigns 1 of 4 hairstylists to work on _____'s hair. Maybe it'll be the hairstylist who is most drawn to his/her hair. S/he's a little nervous.

____ says s/he's headed towards the Poetry Foundation and asks if they have an office here in the Town Center. I tell him/her yes, I know, I've been there but I don't get invited too often. I make them nervous because I speak directly and what's on my mind. I have issues with the Poetry Foundation.


* * *

I'm at a fancy hotel for a work conference. I sit on a small sofa. A young man sits next to me. We both rest each other's heads against one another. He looks to me and says he wants a baby. A symphony begins. _____ is sitting in front of me. All of a sudden s/he is painted with shimmering paint all over his/her shirtless body. _____ begins playing the violin with the orchestra. Everyone claps. I tell someone that _____ is amazing. S/he's a poet, violinist and an oncologist.


* * *

I'm telling _____ about the hummus and veggie sandwich at Cosi. S/he seems interested.


* * *

guess the dream poet - part 1 (2012)

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

A lecture is about to start. ______ comes up and says something snotty, inferring that I've been cruel to him related to matters of the heart. I snap. I yell about how I never did anything to imply that I was ever romantically interested and that he made it all up in his head. I yell that I'm married. ______ isn't the first guy to complain about this and I've had about enough.


* * *


I'm sitting at a dinner table with other people. This is our last meal before the Hunger Games. Somebody points out the Neverending Porch. I never noticed it before so I walk to it. At first it seems like a normal porch. I walk to one side and nothing is strange about it. I look to the other side and it seems different from when I first glanced over. The ground is soft and wet like we're on the edge of a pond. When you touch the air, it's bouncy, like water, like a portal. On the other side I see the pond. ______ runs right through the portal. We watch him splash around in the water. There's a large water snake that ______ seems to be taunting. I yell for him to save his energy for tomorrow's Hunger Games.


* * *

__(Poet 1)__ drops me off at a psychiatric hospital. I go in for medication. __(Poet 2)__ arrives too. I go through a drawer to help __(Poet 2)__ find some clothing that will fit him/her.

I go to a bakery stand. My usual cinnamon doughnuts aren't available. After looking at my options, I decide to get a dozen chocolate doughnuts. Not something I'd usually get now, although its something I would have in the past. __(Poet 3)__ tries to talk me out of it and points me towards a cinnamon scone. But I've made my decision, I want the dozen chocolate doughnuts. __(Poet 3)__ is very persistent. I get annoyed. I tell the manager that it's a good thing I've taken my medication today.


* * *

______ is here with her/his young daughter. ______ is spraying her with rubbing alcohol and perfume to make it smell like the daughter has been drinking. ______ thinks this will be a funny joke. Then ______ sprays the daughter's mouth with the alcohol and perfume so her breath smells like it. The perfume is oily and runs down her chin. This crosses the line.

The Dream Poet Anthology 2012

Below are the names of poets who made appearances or were mentioned in my dreams during 2012. Some of these poets I know well, others are acquaintances and some are complete strangers. If you find your name is on this list and you do not know me, it means that I know of you via your work or reputation and my psyche has attached some type of meaning or symbolism on you to represent something.

Or maybe it means something else completely. Who can say with any certainty what a dream means? Maybe it means you've been selected for a psychic quest of great importance? Maybe it means I'm watching you through a pair of binoculars at this very moment? Who knows. Just don't ask me for details of the dream. Seriously, don't.

2012 Contributors:


Scott Abel, Deborah Ager, Sandra Beasley, Hugh Behm-Steinberg, Matt Bell, Zachary Benavidez, April Bernard, Tara Betts, Lucy Biederman, Julie Bloemeke, Anne Boyer, Ana Božičević, Somner Browning, Julianne Buchsbaum, Jenna Cardinale, Kelly Cockerham, Shanna Compton, Eduardo Corral, Gerald Costanzo, Bruce Covey, Karen Craigo, Phil Crippen, Catherine Daly, Peter Davis, the “youngest” Dickman brother who is still a teenager, Sharon Dilworth, Oliver de la Paz, Kate Durbin, Thomas Sayers Ellis, Jill Alexander Essbaum, Steve Fellner, Ryan Flaherty, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Elisa Gabbert, Neil Gaiman, Susana Gardner, Roxane Gay, Bernadette Geyer, Tod Goldberg, Rigoberto González, Nada Gordon, Noah Eli Gordon, Rae Gouirand, Lea Graham, Paul Guest, Charlie Jensen, Saeed Jones, Tayari Jones, Wendi Kaufman, Matt Kirkpatrick, Amy King, Rauan Klassnik, Jennifer L. Knox, Shafer Hall, Joseph Harrington, Kaplan Harris, Matthew Hittinger, Ton van 't Hof, Dave Housley, Amy King, Stieg Larsson, John Edward Lawson, David Lehman, Amy Lemmon, Emily Lloyd, Tao Lin, Helen Losse, Rebecca Loudon, Tony Mancus, Joe Massey, Cate Marvin, David McDonald, Erika Meitner, Gwendolyn Joyce Mintz, Ben Mirov, Anita Naegeli, Aimee Nezhukumatathil, Hoa Nguyen, Daniel Padilla, Danielle Pafunda, G.M. Palmer, Karl Parker, Richard Peabody, Scott Pierce, Bill Piestch, Robert Pinsky, PF Potvin, Liam Rector, Rob Roberge, Tony Robinson, Steve Roggenbuck, Lee Ann Roripaugh, Ken Rumble, Carly Sachs, Metta Sama, Standard Schaefer, Michael Schiavo, Zachary Schomburg, Laura Sheahen, Frank Sherlock, Evie Shockley, Kim Gek Lin Short, Ricco Siasco, Martha Silano, Sandra Simonds, Tupac Shakur, Dale Smith, Frank Stafford, Nicole Steinberg, Brent Terry, Tony Tost, Catherynne Valente, Rich Villar, Chris Vitiello, James Wagner, Fritz Ward, Roxanne Halpine Ward, Joshua Marie Wilkinson, Jim Woessner, Allyssa Wolf, C. Dale Young, Dean Young


Frequently Asked Questions


Q: I'm a writer, but not a poet. Why am I included on a poet list?
A: Simmer down and accept the compliment.

Q: Can I submit my work for next year's anthology?
A: This anthology only accepts psychic submissions. Submit to my unconscious and perhaps you will be allowed in.

Q: Does my appearing on this list mean that you are obsessed with or stalking me?
A: Possibly.

Q: Will you tell me the details of the dream I appeared in?
A: No, absolutely not. Assume the dream was totally demented and would disturb you a great deal.

Q: I'm a poet and I'm psychically awesome, why aren't I included in this anthology?
A: There are three possible reasons you are not included:

1. You didn't appear in my dreams in 2012. Resolve in 2013 to be more ambitious psychically.
2. You did appear in my dreams, but I don't remember. I forget many dreams. Your omission is a simple case of editorial oversight. You were screwed, unintentionally.
3. You did appear in my dreams, but I am loathe to publicly admit such a thing. This applies to a small percentage of poets appearing in my dreams. Your omission is a simple case of editorial bias. You were screwed, intentionally.


Dream Poet Anthology Mad Libs:

guess the dream poet - part 1 (2012)

guess the dream poet - part 2 (2012)

guess the dream poet -- part 3 (2012)

guess the dream poet -- part 4 (2012)

guess the dream poet -- part 5 (2012)

Past anthologies:

The Dream Poet Anthology 2011

The Dream Poet Anthology 2010

The Dream Poet Anthology 2009

dream interpretation via the bibliomancy oracle

One way I've been using the Bibliomancy Oracle is to offer another avenue for dream interpretation. I'm finding the results to be pretty fascinating and an excellent method to discover unseen possibilities.


Dream Example: Chris bought a new car. The dealer convinced him to buy two black jaguars (as in the cats) to go along with his (non-jaguar) car. I'm unhappy that Chris did this -- what are we going to do with wild animals? We can't control them, I insisted. As I drove the car down our old street, three black jaguars headed for us.  I tried to avoid them, but they kept coming. I drove away and saw in the rearview mirror that they were in pursuit. I sped up and took highways that I wasn't familiar with that brought us to a high school sports ceremony dinner. It's not the dinner we were planning on attending, but it would do. I looked at my watch and it showed that two of the jaguars were 0 miles away, they were very close. The third jaguar was several miles away. My watch also told me how many tears the jaguars shed.

What is the first black jaguar?

Arms can move a head, that’s the trouble;
feet argue constantly with other feet
and treat the ground poorly.

from “Conspiratory Love Poem Addressing All Imaginable Possibilities” by Shafer Hall

What is the second black jaguar?

This is a night of evenly spaced-
out escalators. This is a night of werewolves.


from “This is a Night of Evenly Spaced-Out Escalators” by Zachary Schomburg

What is the third black jaguar (the one farther behind)?

what is love without arrows?

Mistake

from “The Young Astronomer In His Ecstasy” by Miguel Murphy

What do the jaguars want?

It must be so lonely. Selling shoes
for eternity, never learning any new jokes.
  

from “Of All The Dead People I Know” by Karyna McGlynn

What are the jaguars’ tears about?

remember the mystery/light when you were

new you can learn the body

again you can get wasted

like a language the desert is also a distance


from “Map of the Things You Forgot” by Cindy St. John

What will happen if/when the jaguars catch me?

one-twelfth of our lives is wasted
standing in a line.



from “They say” by Laura Kasischke

What is this high school celebratory dinner about?

Use your imagination. Close your eyes
and make a wish. Say the magic words.



from “Late Invocation for Magic” by Jim Daniels

Hmm, ok, I better go make that wish now.



Last night I asked the oracle for today's mantra:

Shut your eyes to what a worm he is, concentrate on his caress—but know

Every half-truth is bound to call up its suppressed synoptic double.


from “I Too Have Been to Candyland” by Anthony Madrid

Well, ok then, shutting my eyes as I type.

can I suffer and tweet at the same time?

A recent horoscope suggested that I don't squander my awesomeness on old hurts. I didn't take its advice today and squandered a bit of my awesomeness. For the greater good, I told myself, but probably not when it's wasted on deaf ears. After the squandering, I dreamed that I saw myself lying on the floor of a jail cell. I thought, I need to tweet that shit, but paused. If I'm tweeting about my incarceration, is it really that serious and worthy of comment? Can I really be suffering and oppressed, if I'm tweeting? I considered tweeting in C's voice as if he was announcing my jail news, but that seemed dishonest. I don't think I figured out what to do regarding my very compelling tweet announcement. (End of scene)

Another recent dream involved my trying out for something like American Idol except Roger Ebert was the judge. I waited all day in a line with a woman I sang next to in middle school chorus. I didn't know why I was trying out, I believed my voice not to be special, possibly not any good at all. I figured I was there so I might as well go through the motions. I did my do ra me warmup and popped in a few Tic Tacs to address my gnarly morning breath. The woman and I were the last people to be given a chance to tryout. Ebert was very friendly and chatty. We talked about how we remember Tupac in a certain way because he died so young, he remains still in time, but Snoop Dogg on the other hand . . . I was like "yeah, Snoop does guest appearances on a bunch of my son's Nickelodeon programs. Twenty years ago white American was terrified of that guy and now he's considered so tame, he entertains children. How times change!" We had a good chuckle then a bunch of dudes came and started taking the stage apart. Ebert said we better hurry up and sing while we still have our chance. I realized I didn't have a song, but the other woman did and she started singing "What a Wonderful World." Ebert motioned for me not to just stand there like a dope but to join in, so I did. Then one of the guys who's taking everything apart starts singing the song, really loud, drowning us out, which is kind of obnoxious because this is supposed to be our tryout and then ANOTHER guy joins the song and they change it to a song about how lesbians shouldn't have children. Shocked and bewildered Ebert, the woman and I stand there with WTF? expressions. (End of scene)


I do walk around with a semi-permanent WTF expression or at least the WTF feeling most of the time. Maybe it's because I'm almost 40 and becoming disconnected (happily, I think) from the "new/up-and-coming/young" as much as I feel disconnected by the generation before me with what I consider to be their warmed-over, no longer relevant debates they occasionally still rehash. Then there's my own generation, don't even get me started. While I still try to follow conversations the literary types are having, I'm becoming more and more puzzled. Like a confused senior citizen who no longer understands how to operate her modern television. How did this become that? sort of thing. What do they think I need that for? Who on Earth would ever use that? And most importantly, How did "What a Wonderful World" get co-opted by a bunch of entitled jackasses and become "Lesbians Shouldn't Have Children"?

Am I in this strange transitional space where I'm neither young nor old? Should I listen to my elder Ebert and speak/sing up? Should I even engage the jackasses? Would that change anything? Can I speak without engaging the diseased elements? If I stay quiet, does that mean they get to rewrite the song into their own illness and rule the world with it?


Just some questions I'm pondering these days.


p.s. Apologies to any olds or youngs I may have offended in this post. Please forgive me. I'm new to middle age.

guess the dream poet - part 5

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

__Poet 1__ is in the bathroom. I'm hiding and giggling with __Poet 2__. We see a pile of baby bottle nipples underneath __Poet 1's__ bed. I tell __Poet 2__ that __Poet 1__ is sort of obsessed with feeding babies since he and his wife adopted one. __Poet 2__ says that he nastily went after her step-mother. The stepmother was an outspoken proponent of breastfeeding. I tell __Poet 2__ that's probably because __Poet 1's__ wife had such a difficult time breastfeeding, he probably saw her stepmother as a threat. But now I'm wondering, where is their adopted baby? Do they even have that baby anymore?

* * *

I'm talking about _______ with some women. They're telling me how he's not sexy anymore. I'm a little surprised. I remember his sexy calves from just last year.

* * *

_______ is making some kind of poetry video. He and his father chase a small airplane that's driving down a street. They jump on the back wheels and hold on. Then they're inside the plane. As the plane cruises up and down the road, he and his barrel-chested father take turns hanging out the window topless, just like if they were cruising in a car. Some women find this sexy.

* * *

In a math class. I can't figure out how to do a simple equation. I keep getting one of the parts wrong. This is something I used to be able to do but I've forgotten how and can't seem to learn it again. The teacher is making me learn again. I'm frustrated. At one point _______ is here. He/she seems really disappointed or in disbelief that I can't do this. I wonder if I have some kind of brain damage. It almost would seem like a relief -- to have a legitimate reason for why I'm struggling.

* * *

_______ is my mother. She's just returned from being in prison for 2 years. I'm a teenager and there's a lot of friction between us. We're living in a giant, beautiful mansion. I tell her I'm going to the bathroom. I go inside and a minute later she comes in, because it's the door into her bedroom. I yell at her that I told her I'd be in there. Every time I try to sit on the toilet, I notice another door that's open, and go close it. Some of the time I can even keep the doors closed. _______ yells at me that I've been in the bathroom a long time. I scream that I just want a few minutes on the toilet with some privacy, is that so much to ask for?

_______ wants me to go to my therapy appointment. I want to go, but I'm not ready and I argue with her on the balcony outside of my bedroom. I challenge _______ to a fight. I say "come on, let's go, prison rules!" not only showing that I'm not afraid of her, but I could give her the prison rule advantage and still kick her ass.

* * *

guess the dream poet - part 4

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

__Poet 1__ is at the Tortilla Factory waiting for __Poet 2__, __Poet 1__ has really long eyelashes that spell out the message: DEATH.

* * *

I'm with __Poet 1__ and __Poet 2__ . We're smoking pot in a field. I'm smoking it from a big long pipe, relighting it. I'm smoking it for a really long time. __Poet 2's__ dad tells me to cut it out and get to work. To get to the fields I have to climb a wall. It's tricky.

* * *

I'm sitting in Poets and Busboys waiting for __Poet 1__ to arrive for a one-on-one meeting. I have a Poets and Busboys pencil that he/she gave me, still unsharpened. I remember that he/she introduced me to this place before he/she had his falling out with it. __Poet 2__ and __Poet 3__ join me at my table. They're talking about an amazing, brilliant woman who seems to be able to do everything. She was a poet, a stripper who was so alluring and sexy, men pursued her, a Playboy model and now a conductor. She's done everything except have children, which they thought she wouldn't do because she was too smart for men.

__Poet 2__ and __Poet 3__ get up and excuse themselves. I get sleepy and slump over at the table waiting for them to return. __Poet 2__ brings me a cup of coffee. I see that they joined this amazing woman, who looks middle aged and a little heavy with red hair, at her table. I wonder why they left my table, instead of having her join ours.

* * *

My work is rejected at a magazine. Since I know the editor, I ask him why. Another editor, _______ , responds saying nobody else demands a reason. I'm angry. I wasn't demanding anything, I just asked. I think about my response to him/her. I decide that I'll never ask why again.

I'm sitting in a car and a man walks by and tells me that he doesn't consider me an important part of American poetry these days. I don't write. I don't publish. I'm inconsequential now. I tell him that I don't care what he thinks. I've moved on to something bigger and more important. A police officer comes up and handcuffs the man. I ask if he's being arrested and the officier says yes. I ask if I can taser the man. The officer chuckles. I ask if I can stick my finger in the man's butt. The officer chuckles again. Another man walks up and says he wants to rape the man in handcuffs. That crosses the boundary of a good joke. The officer takes the man in handcuffs away.

* * *

_______ publishes a book. It was supposed to be an anthology, a second in a series. But hardly anyone sent to it. So instead he/she wrote a number of small paragraphs, one per page, about his/her process of finding submissions and how I helped him/her. I buy a copy of the book, not knowing, and am a little touched to discover I made this difference--although my helping him/her publicize the call for work seemed to only bring two submissions. The word "rebtard" is used in the book. Maybe it was something I said.

* * *

_______ and I are playing an imaginative game. He/she is wearing a mask at first. We're telling some kind of story. I come across something online where a slobbish guy puts a mullet on his baby and calls it "Baby Bieber." For $1 you can get your picture taken with the baby. I'm very critical of how this man is exploiting his child, but relieved to see it's only for $1.

* * *

I'm talking about _______ with somebody-- about how he/she went overboard with his/her public grief. How I felt bad for him/her, but it was too much so I unfriended him/her on FB.

* * *

guess the dream poet - part 3

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

_______ and I walk around my kitchen. We're talking about using sensation, both pleasure and pain, to control animals. I say that I've seen zookeepers be nice to animals. _______ says all the zookeepers he/she's seen have been nice. I know that not all of them are nice, some can be very cruel. I tell him/her about the camels outside my house being controlled with a knife. We walk to a concert and see the camels. We go up to them and join their circle by sitting down. The camels recognize us. The performance starts.

* * *

I'm on a mission with _______ and other poets. We're running across an outdoor, dusty space, trying to get somewhere. We have to set off a series of events so some necessary explosions can go off. Were trying to blow up some basilisks. Some of us die doing this.

* * *

I'm a Project Runway contestant. Betsy Johnson is the judge. During the competition she doesn't like any of my ideas. _______ tells me that she's heard a very negative story about who I was in 9th grade. Back then I was a bad and unsafe school bus driver. In 10th grade it was decided that I was completely unworthy of the honor and wasn't invited back. I try to address this issue with Betsy. I point out that in 9th grade I was only 14 years old and not old enough to drive a school bus. Then I remember some advice that the person who'll likely win this challenge is the one who's low key and doesn't get on Betsy's radar. I'm clearly on Betsy's radar. This is not good. I start tearing up pieces of my dress before the judging even starts. They're going to hold this against me. A woman tells me that they're making plans to cut me. I can't really argue with this. I know it's my time to go.

* * *

I'm in _______ 's gender studies class. I'm supposed to write 2 papers about Blue _____.

* * *

I'm meeting with _______. _______ has accepted my unwritten book, Oranges and Oranges, for publication at his/her press. We're having a conference call with the cover designer. I suggest that we do a Sci-Fi inspired covered, one that takes the original style of sci-fi books, but twists it around and makes something new from it. The designer doesn't want to hear any of it. She isn't even considering what I'm saying. She says, "oh, you want some beefcake on the cover" -- and I say "no, I want a woman on the cover!" But I'm at a loss and can't say much about the book because I haven't written it yet.

* * *

guess the dream poet - part 2

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *

Something about forgetting or not recognizing _______ .

* * *

I'm in a yoga class with _______ . The class is getting full and I want to get out before it starts, but _______ slows us down and now we're stuck in this crowded class. We're spinning hula hoops on our arms. I try my best not to hit the person next to me. Now there are zombies everywhere and almost everyone is dead. There's somebody here who can control the zombies. For some reason I feel safe, like I won't be turned into a zombie like everyone else. The man sends me into another room. A zombie follows and attacks me. I'm waiting for the man to come in and stop this. He doesn't. Nobody saves me.

* * *

I'm at a home inspection. _______ is the seller. He/she seems very skittish and it seems like I intimidate him/her. I'm suspicious. He/she moves funny. I grab him/her and accuse him/her of having a gun. I find one under his/her shirt and grab it. I call for help while holding the gun to _______ 's head.

* * *

_______ helped me interpret a Tarot spread. I do another on my own. I lay out the cards and realize that somehow I did it wrong--there should be 3 cards but there is 4 piles of cards (several cards deep). I decide that both center cards will be the present. One of the cards is the Adorable Puppy.

* * *

I read an announcement that _______ died. I'm surprised.

* * *

I see _______ walking around a bookfair, holding a big stack of books, including 6 copies of the Bedside Guide that he/she seems to have swiped from my unmanned table. I pretend to corner him/her, like I'm going to tackle him/her, but I'm just playing around. _______ freaks out, drops all the books and runs into a drainage pipe, like Gadhafi. I tell him/her it's OK, he can have the books I was just playing around. _______ says that he/she is not teaching now and that he/she is unemployed. He/she said he/she wanted one of the books for his mother. I tell _______ that he/she should start his/her own MFA program -- one that wasn't affiliated with anything. Something totally independent and unique.

guess the dream poet - part 1

Guess which poets listed (or possibly omitted) in the below dream anthology belongs in the blanks.

* * *


Chris and his friend find a restaurant to take me to for my birthday celebration. I remind them that I invited _______ to join us. Chris and his friend would rather this poet wouldn't join us because he/she has drab shoes.


* * *

I'm with _______ and a bunch of other poets. We're headed to "Lulu's Pizza." Newt Gingrich, wearing a funny hat, is going with us.


* * *

__Poet 1__ hands me a poem written on a sock. He/she asks me if I know of__Poet 2's__ affair with another writer's wife. I say "just a little" but I'm not sure if I know anything about this. The affair is known as Black _______. __Poet 3__ interrupts our conversation and says that we shouldn't be discussing the illegitimate autistic children of poets. I thank __Poet 1__ for the poem.

* * *

I'm watching a music video with _______. _______ is in the video. I'm wondering why she didn't tell me about the video. Then I wonder if she did, but I just forgot. I'm jealous because _______ is becoming successful and I am not. We rewind the video and watch again. It takes forever to rewind. _______ is bent over to bring attention to her breasts. She believes this is her "good angle." The video is all about her body and how she wants to be thinner. It seems really shallow and I'm disappointed. I remind myself that I'm a much more thoughtful poet.